The Bard Of Knotty Ash

Later this year, Ken Dodd will be 80. He made his first stage appearance at the Empire Theatre, Nottingham over fifty years ago in 1954 and still plays regularly to full houses. We rarely see Ken on our TV screens these days. He has remained faithful to the theatre , and has been a regular tourer of the provinces for many a year now, normally spending four months out of twelve on the road. If you like your comedy to be quickfire one liners , I suggest you catch his show in a town near you. Oh , and go prepared for a long night out. A Ken Dodd stage show typically starts about 7.30, with an interval around 10.30. He normally has a support act but the show is mainly Ken. Expect the second half to end somewhere between 12.30 and 1 am. This man goes on and on and the longevity of his act has become a joke in itself. At the break he warns his audience 'we'll let you out for a few minutes but no running away'. From midnight onwards he often looks at his watch between gags and is by now threatening the audience - 'I'll follow you home and shout jokes through your letterbox '. When you go to see Ken Dodd for a second time you know to take a few biscuits and a drink with you to help get you through! He is amazingly funny, he is saucy but somehow not rude. The experience has a music hall feel to it in keeping with Doddy's roots and you leave the theatre feeling that life is a lot more fun than when you went in.

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Kenneth Arthur Dodd was born on 8 November 1927 in Knotty Ash, Liverpool. He was the son of a coal merchant. Throughout his life he has kept a strong affinity with his home town. Liverpool is proud of Ken and Ken is proud of Liverpool. He still lives in the same house he was born in. The Ken Dodd Show first appeared on the BBC in 1959 and as was the case with most comedians of that era, his popularity exploded through the medium of television. Ken was then, as he still is today, a family entertainer and therefore perfect for 'the box'. By the mid sixties he was also firmly established as a stage performer too. In 1965 he performed for a record 42 consecutive weeks at the London Palladium, appearing twice nightly. He also gained entry into The Guinness Book Of Records for the worlds longest joke telling session - 1500 jokes in three and a half hours. Ken Dodd has a reputation for his meticulous recording of jokes - which ones he used in each show, where the show was, and how well it went down. It is this dedication and self assessment that has kept him at the very top for over half a century.

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Ken Dodd is arguably the most bizarre comedian Britain has ever produced. He has many trademarks and his ability to get peoples chuckle muscles working (his term not mine) is hugely assisted by his appearance. There is his outrageous hairstyle for starters. As a young man he grew his hair long, allowing him to rough it up and give a 'just dragged through a hedge backwards' look. It made him immediately funny. His daft facial expression comes as a result of his hugely protruding teeth, the result of a fall from a bicycle as a young boy. So important to his act are his teeth, he reportedly insured them for £4 million. Ken Dodd is also immensely colourful and dresses in all kinds of weird and wonderful costumes , pantomime style. Then he has his feather duster tickling stick, a unique and much used prop, allowing him to use his catchphrase ' By Jove, how tickled I am................'. Add to all of this his six jokes a minute and you have a comic legend.

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There is something quite magical about Ken Dodd. He transports his audience to a far off land where a giggle is all that matters. His humour has a childlike innocence about it. It is incredibly warm.Your passport to his fantasy world comes in the shape of those other famous residents of Knotty Ash - those squeaky voiced midgets The Diddymen. Sometimes they appear as puppets, their leader Dickie Mint normally has an emotional spot in the stage show with Doddy again returning to his roots,this time as a ventriloquist. On other occasions they are actually children dressed as the Diddymen. They sing and they dance. Diddyland has the highest sunshine rate in the world, jam butty mines, snuff quarries, a moggie ranch where police cats are bred, a broken biscuit repair works and gravy wells.The richest Diddyman is the Hon Nigel Ponsonby-Smallpiece who owns a caviar allotment and a pond full of 18 carat goldfish! Pure fantasy and all wonderfully brought to life by Ken Dodd.

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Whilst Ken Dodd will always be remembered as a comedian, he also had two other major talents in his younger days as an actor and as a singer. On the stage he played serious Shakespearian roles and also appeared on television in Doctor Who. But it was as a singer that he made a huge mark in the 60's. He spent a total of 233 weeks in the charts in a recording career between 1960 and 1981. His most famous song was 'Tears' which was No 1 for five weeks in 1965, stayed in the charts for 24 weeks and sold over 2 million records. His trademark song is 'Happiness' which has become his signature tune and sums up Doddy and most of what his act stands for.

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Ken Dodd has never married but has had two long time partners, Anita Boutin whom he shared 24 years with before her death, and Anne Jones who has been with him even longer. He is a private man who is rarely in the news. He was the centre of attraction in 1989 in a tax evasion court case in which he was acquitted. Typically, references to it are sprinkled throughout his act : '' I told the Inland Revenue I didn't owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside''.

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I will never, if I can possibly help it , choose my all time favourite comedian. To do so would mean having to place too many legends further down the list. But I must admit Ken Dodd would come very close to being at the top. In an age where filth and nastiness passes for humour, he represents all that has ever been great in the history of laughter. My final tribute is six Ken Dodd jokes that I have just pulled off the internet. About a minutes worth !!

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My act is very educational.I heard a man leaving the other night saying 'Well that taught me a lesson'.

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I haven't spoken to my mother in law for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.

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Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children. Sun for the wife. Sharks for the wife's mother.

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Of course I believe in safe sex. I've got a handrail around the bed.

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I know a glazier who repaired 146 windows before he realised he had a crack in his glasses.

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My Dad always knew I was going to be a comedian. When I was a baby he looked at me and said ' Is this a joke ? '

I Laughed My Socks Off....................

............when I first heard this

From an episode of Duty Free. Amy Pearce shows her distaste of bullfighting and tells the matador El Macho that his profession is barbaric. He defends himself by saying he is 'an artist'. To which Amy replies : 'You're no artist. You're just a hitman for Fray Bentos' !

Look At Your Face - Dave Allen

One thing many of us can laugh about is our childhood. Recollection of happy memories is a satisfying pastime, more so when brought into focus by a comic master as good as Dave Allen. This clip is full of observation of how adults treated us when we were kids and there will be millions (and especially boys) who can relate to part if not all of it. The 'look at your face' gag is the funniest moment. Many a mother will have said this to their child. Allen, with his charming and compelling delivery easily captivates his audience, and then drives home his point with the usual mixture of exasperation and vulgarity. However good our childhood and however much our parents loved us, they often had no idea what they put us through. Thank you to this Irish genius for bringing it all back !

Redcoats

Billy Butlin opened his first holiday camp in 1936, in the Lincolnshire seaside town Skegness. A few days into it , his customers were struggling to get into the holiday spirit and in order to whip up some enthusiasm, Butlin had his staff involved in entertaining the guests. Soon after he dressed them in red blazers so they would be more noticeable.

Employment as a Butlin Redcoat was to prove a stepping stone for many a famous funnyman. Long days ( and often rainy days at that ) trying to make the British working class laugh, was a great training ground. The following list is ten comedians who were Redcoats before they had their big break into TV or radio shows :
1 Roy Hudd
2 Jimmy Tarbuck
3 Dave Allen
4 Charlie Drake
5 Michael Barrymore
6 Freddy 'Parrotface' Davies
7 Terry Scott
8 Ted Rodgers
9 Johnny Vegas
10 Colin Crompton

I Didn't Know That - # 3

You stumble across all kinds of things you didn't know whilst researching for a blog :

Bruce Forsyth is a dedicated fan of Tottenham Hotspur FC.

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'Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em' is of course a 70's BBC sitcom. It was however, also a catchphrase used many years before by Jimmy Clitheroe.

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Radio DJ David 'Diddy' Hamilton appeared in the 1967 TV show Doddy's Music Box as the straight man to Ken Dodd. Being of small stature he was nicknamed 'Diddy', as in the Diddymen, a name which was to stick forever.

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Jimmy Tarbuck went to the same school in Liverpool as John Lennon.

Pat Coombs

This wonderful lady was one of the busiest and best loved British comedy actresses for over forty years before her death in 2002. Born a cockney, she was famous for her portrayal of weak, suppressed women and her grasp of funny voices. She started in radio before moving on into TV and film. Though best remembered for her comic roles she also played some more serious parts and was also a regular in game shows.

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Pat Coombs was born Patricia Doreen Coombs in Camberwell, South London in 1926. At the age of six she decided she wanted to be an entertainer, after falling in love with a gypsy violinist on a family holiday in Worthing. She began work as a kindergarten teacher before turning her hand to acting. Her first roles were in radio, where she appeared with comic legends such as Arthur Askey, Bob Monkhouse, Ted Ray, and Charlie Chester. With the advent of television Pat (or Pattie as she is often affectionately referred to) was to feature in so many of our finest comedy productions. Perhaps the best way to pay tribute to her is simply to list them and some of the great stars she appeared with :

Hancock's Half Hour, Beggar My Neighbour, Til Death Us Do Part and its sequel In Sickness And In Health,Up Pompeii, Don't Drink The Water, Dad's Army, Lollipop Loves Mr Mole, You're Only Young Twice,Carry On Doctor, Carry On Again Doctor, On The Buses (film), Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory, Ken Dodd, Roy Hudd, Roy Castle, Eric Sykes, June Whitfield, Reg Varney, Spike Milligan and Dick Emery. Towards the end of her career she was a regular in Noel's House Party, Celebrity Squares, and Blankety Blank.

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Pat Coombs was a constant face on our TV screens. She often played the dim, soppy, downtrodden female with a nervy giggle and twitch. Ironically, one of her more confident characters was to provide a lasting comic memory. She played a bus driver in the On The Buses film. Stan and Jack trap her in her cab and Pat is seen climbing out via the window, revealing a pair of large pink knickers.

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Pat's last major TV role was in 1989 in EastEnders where she was introduced as the character Marge Green in an attempt to add some humour to the soap. Her final sitcom role was in 1992 in an episode of Birds Of A Feather. Pat was tall and thin, which contributed greatly to her ability to play the puny, vulnerable woman. In 1995, she was diagnosed with the brittle bone disease, osteoporosis, which shrunk her by some six inches in size. She bore her illness with fantastic good humour and turned her time to fund raising for The National Osteoporosis Society. It is said she once raised £35,000 in just five days. She never married though apparently came close on a couple of occasions. She was 75 when she passed away in a West London nursing home, to which she had moved to in order to be close to her great friend (and another great comedy actress) Peggy Mount.

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I don't know, but I think Pat 'Pattie' Coombs was probably one of the most respected and well loved actresses of her time, not only by her audiences but by her fellow professionals as well.

Postcards # 2

Two more postcards from my collection. Both are from the publishers Bamforth. The top one is No 2360 by the artist Fitzpatrick and underneath is No 421 by Taylor. They were posted from Skegness in 1968 and Llandudno in 1977 respectively.

Pot Noodles

Have I Got News For You has been running since 1990. Ian Hislop and Paul Merton have been the team captains for much of that time but following the demise of Angus Deayton in 2002 (following revelations in his private life), the programme chairman has changed from show to show. In this clip the guest presenter is Jack Dee, whose dry sense of humour dovetails brilliantly with Merson, who is, in my opinion, a modern great with comic talent to compare with the very best. The more I watch the piece the funnier I find it. Simple word play that starts silly and gets more so as each panellist tries to get the final say.The other two guests are John O'Farrell and Liza Tarbuck.

Ray Of Sunshine # 3 - Major Gowen

The third in the series Ray Of Sunshine,dedicated to the comedy characters who contributed to the great British sitcom. The characters are listed in no particular order, just as I think of them.........but they all brightened our lives.

Ray Of Sunshine # 3 MAJOR GOWEN

There were four main characters in that great sitcom Fawlty Towers. They were of course Basil and his wife Sybil, Polly, and Spanish waiter Manuel. Story lines generally revolved around the hotel guests and each episode brought a new clientele.However there were three people who were permanent residents; two old ladies, Miss Gatsby and Miss Tibbs, and the wonderfully eccentric Major Gowen. Only twelve episodes of this hugely acclaimed comedy were ever made and the Major appeared in them all. His contributions were relatively small in terms of screen time, but in the course of the two series he became established as a much loved character. Sometimes he was involved in the main story and sometimes simply as a foil to Mr Fawlty, who you suspect rather liked him.

The Major was essentially an old English gentleman, always immaculately attired and well spoken. He had an air of pomposity about him.He was ending his days on the English Riviera, Torquay, not in luxury, but certainly without a care in the world. His favourite area of the Hotel was the bar where he was often seen with his pre-dinner drink. Basil referred to him on one occasion,though not to his face, as a 'drunken old sod '. But presumably he was a good customer for the Fawlties. The amazing thing of course was the Major's total oblivion to all that was happening around him. Bad service, awful food, rude management, and even a dead body on one occasion and it all passed the Major by. He was a befuddled, bemused, absent minded character at the best of times. Add to this the suspicion that the Major was also often just a little bit tipsy and there was little wonder that he was never in tune with the lunacy of the Fawlty Towers Hotel.

The Major was an old soldier and had an enormous dis-like of foreigners and Germans in particular. He was an old colonial who loved his daily newspaper. 'Have the papers arrived yet Fawlty?' he would ask at breakfast time (they never had arrived) followed by 'Why do we bother Fawlty?' after he had read them. He was often critical of working Britain and the strikes that disrupted the economy. His other loves were cricket (he would give Basil snippets of information though he never seemed much bothered) and women (the Major sometimes reminisced about old lovers). These two topics led to one of the Major's most famous lines. He was telling Fawlty about a woman he once loved - ' I took her to see India. At the Oval' !

The other guests coming and going from Fawlty Towers were a mixed bunch. But few matched the eccentricity of the Major. He was doddering and blank featured. Basil tried to get him to understand but normally gave up. Viewers loved the interplay between the pair and generally shared Basil's frustration. The three most remembered incidents involving the Major were from the episodes 'Communication Problems' ( a farcical show in which he is entrusted to look after Basil's winnings from a bet on the horses and gets totally confused), 'The Germans' ( where he thinks a moose is conversing with him though actually it is Manuel out of shot behind the reception), and 'Basil The Rat' (with the Major, shot gun under arm, returning to his military background though this time in pursuit of vermin ! ).

The private world of Major Gowen was a great one. It is safe to assume that his days were long and trouble free, that he was comfortably off, and had no worries beyond the latest score in the Test match. Any nastiness from Basil fell entirely on stony ground because the Major was was in a permanent state of confusion. He was only ever sharp minded when the conversation involved the past. In 'Waldorf Salad', an irate American guest can't get his food and declares arrogantly ' What I'm suggesting is that this is the crummiest, shoddiest, worst run hotel in the whole of Western Europe'. To which the Major angrily replied: No! No I won't have that. There's a place in Eastbourne..........'

Major Gowen was a dear old gentleman. I would have bought him a drink any day.

The character of Major Gowen was created by John Cleese and Connie Booth. He was played by Ballard Berkeley who made his stage debut in 1928 and was a popular actor in the West End and New York. His other notable TV role was in Fresh Fields and he was also in the radio classic, The Archers. Ballard Berkeley died in 1988 aged 84.

Ray Of Sunshine #4 will be Wesley Pegden

April Fool

Today's Sunday newspapers carried the usual April Fool's stories. The Observer had Tony Blair taking up a new career as an actor once he finishes his business at No 10. He has apparently already signed to appear in Arthur Miller's The Crucible alongside Kevin Spacey and is considering roles in a Xmas special edition of Only Fools And Horses and Doctor Who (where he plays a Prime Minister who travels back in time to correct his mistakes). Readers of the Daily Mail were warned that councils around Britain were appointing garden inspectors to check for evidence of barbecues this summer and users could anticipate a £5 charge for 'carbon offsets'. The Sunday Telegraph ran the story that London is to ask Paris for help with the 2012 Olympics in an effort to contain costs. It was suggested the French could host the opening ceremony and that athletes could warm up on train journeys on Eurostar.